Viva Italia!

In honor of Italy's kick ass (get it?) showing in the World Cup Final today, here are some pictures from Roma, Venezia, and Firenze. In Rome, we were totally taken care of by a friend of a friend who knew the best spots to stay, to eat, and to absorb the city. I ate and drank myself silly and tossed way more than three coins in the Trevi fountain. The highlight for me was visiting St. Peter's and the Vatican Museum. Unbelievable. I'll just leave it at that.

Somewhere right up there is the Pope's apartment. RIP JPII.

If I thought I could have gotten away with it, and not gone straight to Hell, I would have ripped this baby down and shoved it in my backpack:

Moving on, I have to say, I just wanted to go to Venice for the sheer novelty of it, but once we got there, I didn't want to leave. People say, "It's sinking, it's dirty, it stinks." I say, "Shut up, shut up, shut up - all of you." It was absolutely magical, and I will fight to the death anyone who says otherwise. Please observe this:

And this:

And here again with the stealing and the threat of Hell. Except this time I wanted the street sign, too.

Finally, Florence was beautiful, but not exactly what I expected. I was thinking more "A Room with a View," like this:

Which half of the city does look like. But Florence is a "city" in every sense of the word, and it was the only place we were accosted by gypsy children, which was very upsetting and irritating at the same time. I saw them coming with their cardboard, and I just started swinging my arms wildly around me, and yelled, "No! No! No!" as I cut threw them like a band saw. They moved on to some other poor saps. T-Bone was mortified. That said, he must have felt really great later on when I nearly had to throw down with this OBNOXIOUS bitch from New York who was making a huge scene at the Uffizi because a museum worker didn't speak English. Imagine that?! In a FOREIGN country, a local didn't speak Ugly American.