Birthday parties, that is. We had one for Peach at her dance studio on Saturday - a whole ballerina-princess-fairy kind of affair. Her birthday is actually in December, but since everyone is usually gone or crazy busy over the holidays, we let her choose a different time to have her party. Last year was a farm party in October, this year was a ballerinapalooza in February. By the way, it's not about getting stuff - she just loves to see her friends and have some cake (just like her mama). Sounds simple, right? That's what I thought. But the concept is apparently very foreign to those chest-deep in the Birthday Party Circuit.
Case in point: although the invitation for Saturday clearly read "no gifts," half of the girls showed up with gifts - big gifts. And the social calendar of one of the girls is apparently so full that she just made a 15 minute appearance to drop off the gift she wasn't supposed to bring as she headed right back out the door and on to the next engagement. I realize it's not the kids' fault - they're not driving themselves to all of these events and they're not buying the gifts. And I'm glad they seem to want to spend time with my daughter. To a point. Part of the deal is that some kids, and more often their parents, can't stand the thought of missing anything so they will break their necks - and the bank - to be at every brithday party they've ever been invited to, only to complain about it later. I've heard TOO many parents say, "Oh - we were so busy this weekend! We had THREE birthday parties on Saturday!" My question to them is always, "WHY?! Why did you have three birthday parties on Saturday? Is your child so intimately familiar with every one of those children that it would really make a difference to either of them if your child wasn't there?" Sorry folks - it doesn't make a lick of difference to either one of them. When you start inviting kids you don't really know and expect everyone to bring gifts (which are never opened at the party anymore - what's up with that?), it takes on a really impersonal and down right greedy vibe that destroys the whole point of the thing - having FUN with your FRIENDS!
For the last three years, Peach has received birthday party invitations just days after the class rosters come out - before school has even started. Last year, I had to cross reference the phone number on the invitation with the school directory to figure out who the party was even for so I could call and give one of my standard excuses - out of town (for weekend parties) or denist appointment (for weekday parties). It turns out it was a party for two girls, neither of whom was in Peach's class that year or the year before, and they had invited ALL of the 4 year old girls in the whole school. Some might say, "How nice of them to include everyone." Yeah - maybe. But I say, "So we're supposed to get TWO presents for kids we don't even know and then I've got to hunt down the damn parents at the party so I can introduce myself and my kid to them and their kids since none of us know who the hell any of us is?!" I'm not anti-birthday party, I just think there's something very wrong with that whole Circuit scene, and I refuse to let Peach get roped into it. So, for our very fun, gift- and pressure-free parties, we only invite those kids we know she plays with, which she is totally cool with, and we only go the parties of the kids we know. And we always give books - the gift of learning, you greedy Circuit bastards.
Case in point: although the invitation for Saturday clearly read "no gifts," half of the girls showed up with gifts - big gifts. And the social calendar of one of the girls is apparently so full that she just made a 15 minute appearance to drop off the gift she wasn't supposed to bring as she headed right back out the door and on to the next engagement. I realize it's not the kids' fault - they're not driving themselves to all of these events and they're not buying the gifts. And I'm glad they seem to want to spend time with my daughter. To a point. Part of the deal is that some kids, and more often their parents, can't stand the thought of missing anything so they will break their necks - and the bank - to be at every brithday party they've ever been invited to, only to complain about it later. I've heard TOO many parents say, "Oh - we were so busy this weekend! We had THREE birthday parties on Saturday!" My question to them is always, "WHY?! Why did you have three birthday parties on Saturday? Is your child so intimately familiar with every one of those children that it would really make a difference to either of them if your child wasn't there?" Sorry folks - it doesn't make a lick of difference to either one of them. When you start inviting kids you don't really know and expect everyone to bring gifts (which are never opened at the party anymore - what's up with that?), it takes on a really impersonal and down right greedy vibe that destroys the whole point of the thing - having FUN with your FRIENDS!
For the last three years, Peach has received birthday party invitations just days after the class rosters come out - before school has even started. Last year, I had to cross reference the phone number on the invitation with the school directory to figure out who the party was even for so I could call and give one of my standard excuses - out of town (for weekend parties) or denist appointment (for weekday parties). It turns out it was a party for two girls, neither of whom was in Peach's class that year or the year before, and they had invited ALL of the 4 year old girls in the whole school. Some might say, "How nice of them to include everyone." Yeah - maybe. But I say, "So we're supposed to get TWO presents for kids we don't even know and then I've got to hunt down the damn parents at the party so I can introduce myself and my kid to them and their kids since none of us know who the hell any of us is?!" I'm not anti-birthday party, I just think there's something very wrong with that whole Circuit scene, and I refuse to let Peach get roped into it. So, for our very fun, gift- and pressure-free parties, we only invite those kids we know she plays with, which she is totally cool with, and we only go the parties of the kids we know. And we always give books - the gift of learning, you greedy Circuit bastards.
1 comment:
OMG! I am so totally with you on this one! My daughter is going to be three in April and we have gotten invites from her day care "friends" from the time she was about six months old. Okay, my six month old is no one's friend! I am not going to any party where I am addressed only as "Kennedy's Mom".
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