Where Am I?

Seriously, I don't DO the back-to-back, multi-location travel thing very often, so it really throws me for a loop. Like, I woke up one day last week in this reeeaaally boring presentation on the evolution of the Petition Clause, and I thought, howinthehell did I get here? I hardly remembered doing 49 loads of laundry, weeding the front and back flowerbeds, packing for me and mine, and visiting my nemesis the orthopedic doc the day before and THEN driving to friggin' Houston in the 5 o'clock traffic. I barely recalled fighting the morning rush hour traffic the next day (in which I travelled 20 miles in 78 minutes), only to be met with the most godawful humidity as I stumbled my way into the State Bar BoreFest, my hair growing ever-larger with every step. I really think I would have to shave my head if I lived there, and I'm not even kidding.

Somehow, I landed in an hours-long Family Law forum, right in the middle of which I remembered, I. Hate. Family. Law. Sorry, but it's depressing. I did however enjoy a spirited diversity forum and a most inspiring presentation from an old coot from Lubbock (his words) who represented several detainees in Guantanamo. Color me educated and impressed. Lunch with Ms. Karen included several thinly-veiled potshots at Obama (pitiful, really), but I was mostly distracted by her ladies basketball coach haircut anyway. Why? Just, why?! Friday's lunchtime immigration debate was interesting, but my favorite presentation was led by a Cali non-lawyer, showbiz-type dude and showed how television impacts juries. It was awesome because we got to watch tv and movie clips. And I got free popcorn and a tote bag from LawNerds, my former corporate master. I rounded out the day with an entertainment law Q&A with Beyonce's daddy and his legal mouthpiece, and some clown actually asked who wrote B's pre-nup. Hearty laughter all around. Except for me.

Mama Turista brought Peach and Olive down after information bible school on Friday, and the party rolled on from my cousin's house to Abuelita Turista's casa to the Gulf of Mexico. There were fireworks, carousels, and WALL-E. There was sand, surf, and Schlitterbahn. And there was food. My Lord, the food. Also, there were about 68 rounds of Chickenfoot and 437 hands of gin. And one trip to the Lego store (yes, they have one!). We rolled back into town yesterday, only to hit the ground running this morning to see Kit Kittredge, which Peach and Olive loved, even though they don't know the dolls from Adam. Or Eve, as it were. We've got plans with my BIL's crew for tomorrow, and other than that, I've got plans for my big fat ass, my lovely couch, and a full slate of TiFauxed goodness. See ya next week ...